Tag: motivation

WHY YOU’LL NEVER BE CONGRATULATED FOR YOUR GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENTS

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At this time of year, there’s plenty to celebrate. With an influx of engagements and pregnancy announcements – our parties, functions and online feeds are gushing with public proclamations of some recently unlocked life achievement. 


After celebrating my own engagement this year, my partner and I have received many congratulations regarding the upcoming nuptials. Our online announcement elicited many messages of celebration and well wishes, and after the wave of dopamine subsided, I pondered the moments in our lives that will be met with the most congratulations. Weddings, engagements, new jobs, new houses, babies and births – these milestones are widely understood as positive, undoubtedly  celebration-worthy events and they all mark the occurrence of one thing – a new beginning.   
New beginnings are exciting. They symbolize the heralding of something different, and unknown. Starting something new can fuel us with a fresh sense of purpose and direction.
The moments in life that I feel are truly celebration-worthy are not the beginnings. But the middles. When you’re faced with hardship you never anticipated. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable and it is scary and uncomfortable. When everything seems to be conspiring against you. When you are so overwhelmed, broken and defeated and you’re teetering on the brink of giving it all up.


But you don’t.

These silent and noble moments often pass unnoticed. Not met with any filtered Instagram posts or public announcements over Christmas lunch. I often wonder if we underestimate the importance of these moments because they’re not received with a champagne toast, or a stylized photo shoot or 100+ little cyber thumbs-up. 

So with no likelihood of public congratulations, it will be up to you (and perhaps those very close to you) to recognize and celebrate these true life achievements. Albeit not as flashy as the beginnings of a lifelong love or a brand new baby, these moments make up the invisible middles that help strengthen our connections, build our resilience and fill our lives with purpose, direction and growth. So if no ones congratulated you for those moments this year, I’m raising a glass for you right now. 

Why Inspiration Can Be Dangerous

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Do you spend a huge amount of time waiting for motivation/inspiration?
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Whether it’s to write a song, or do an art or make a change, there is a popular notion that things of real value must be born of inspiration. One must feel some sort of deep, driving force to do something before it can be done and so it can be done organically, with authenticity.
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“Inspiration” is so in fash that it’s peddled day in day out in magazines and on insta feeds. I guess what is considered inspiring is different for all of us, and it can be great when it offers us guidance or helps spark our interest in something new.
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But, I feel like most of the time we should chuck the idea of inspiration in the bloody garbage.
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Instead of motivating and encouraging, I find that so called “inspiration” can be stifling, guilt-inducing, and lead you to focus on all the shit you don’t have/are not and wish you did/were.

Most people who claim to be peddling “inspiration” are often just “inspiring” you to spend your money with them. Nothing particularly noble or enlightening there. 
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Inspiration can also be dangerous when it’s considered to be the first step in a series of important actions or changes.
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BE INSPIRED – > DO THE THING
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I can tell you that I have spent a majority of time being uninspired or rationalised feelings of inspiration so much so that I’ve considered them to not be true or authentic inspiration. So I have not done the things. I was stuck at step one. Until I realised that you actually don’t even need step one. You can erase step one altogether and instead just…
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DO THE THING
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No stepping into the gospel church and seeing the light and backflipping down the aisle in your tuxedo, hat and sunglasses necessary.
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Real, positive change is already difficult, without the added pressure of expecting the motivation to come to you like a magic lightening bolt shot out of the ass of a neon unicorn. We have to start challenging desire-led notions of change like “you’ve got to want to change for change to happen”. If you want to change, then change. Doesn’t have to be all at once, but if there is something you want to do, or someone you want to be – do something, anything, to get a little closer to that. Don’t waste time waiting for inspiration. You might be left waiting forever.